February 10, 2015
It's becoming pretty apparent that life does really go on without Facebook. The only reason I really continue to post here is so I can go back and fill in the gaps when I reactivate Facebook, which truly has become the log of my life.
Today I went to my job for the second time, and I really do enjoy it. The lady I work for is amazingly nice and laid back, and her children are well mannered. It's a lot to manage, especially with my knee still giving me some trouble, but I fake it til I make it. It's close to home, the pay is good, there are no pets to deal with and the kids are pretty self sufficient.
The kids had a blast at their Valentine's thing at preschool, and came home loaded up on sugar. That was awesome. It's fun to watch them experience so many new things. I'm clearly coming down with everyone's cold, so I tried to rest as much as I could today. Mike took the kids grocery shopping, which was like a miracle. 2 years, 8 months and 24 days after their birth he took them to the store alone for the very first time. They all survived, and I laid in bed feeling yuck and continuing my binge watching of Bates Motel season 2.
Nothing else remarkable happened. I was sick. I laid around a lot and watched a lot of TV.
Tuesday, February 10, 2015
Monday, February 9, 2015
60 Days Without Facebook - Days 4 & 5
February 8 - 9, 2015
By the time I reached days 4 & 5 I was feeling much less anxiety and total craziness about this whole endeavor. On the 8th I started a new job. It is the first gig I have landed on care.com, and as far as I could tell from day 1 it's going to be nice working with this family. On my way home I stopped at the new Pho restaurant. I'm still in disbelief that there is a pho place in Winder. Anyway, I got them to give it to me with tofu because I am still having the weird meat thing, and I think they must've thought I wanted the tofu in lieu of the noodles, because there were none. DERP. Who eats pho without noodles?
I can't remember if I mentioned or not, but on Friday morning I flooded the bathroom. That's been an ongoing ordeal, and every day our house smells more and more like a toilet. It's so disgusting. Ugh. I still don't know how long it's going to take to get that smell gone completely. I had the bright idea to sprinkle the (still damp) carpet with baking soda. That' helped with the smell, but it clogged the hell out of the vacuum cleaner, and so now I have to figure out how to fix the vacuum AND finish cleaning up the mess. /sigh
On Monday the kids had preschool, and that was fun for them as usual. After I picked them up I met my mom at Great Clips and we cut off all of Ben's hair. I'm still traumatized. Everyone keeps telling me how cute he is and how happy I should be, but I'm not happy. He is cute. He's the cutest little boy I've ever seen. That's just it, though. He's a little boy. My baby is gone.
The kids got a bunch of new books this week. We finished out the What do you Hear/See collection by Eric Carle and added Animalia, Once Upon an Alphabet, Little Blue Truck Leads the Way and Goodnight Moon to our library. I love how much the kids love books.
Other than that I just spent some time getting the kids ready for their Valentine's Day festivities at school on Tuesday. I made goody bags for each child with kinetic sand, a heart necklace, a box of conversation hearts and 2 rolls of smarties. I hope the kids like them
I've been staying busier in general. Working is surely going to help. I am also remembering how much I like crossword puzzles, and have been spending some time on that. I've got a couple of books in the works, Tears and Tantrums by Aletha Solter and The Fault in Our Stars by some person I don't know the name of. The latter is turning out to be another book in a long string disappointing and badly written young adult literature, but to be fair I'm only a couple chapters in.
By the time I reached days 4 & 5 I was feeling much less anxiety and total craziness about this whole endeavor. On the 8th I started a new job. It is the first gig I have landed on care.com, and as far as I could tell from day 1 it's going to be nice working with this family. On my way home I stopped at the new Pho restaurant. I'm still in disbelief that there is a pho place in Winder. Anyway, I got them to give it to me with tofu because I am still having the weird meat thing, and I think they must've thought I wanted the tofu in lieu of the noodles, because there were none. DERP. Who eats pho without noodles?
I can't remember if I mentioned or not, but on Friday morning I flooded the bathroom. That's been an ongoing ordeal, and every day our house smells more and more like a toilet. It's so disgusting. Ugh. I still don't know how long it's going to take to get that smell gone completely. I had the bright idea to sprinkle the (still damp) carpet with baking soda. That' helped with the smell, but it clogged the hell out of the vacuum cleaner, and so now I have to figure out how to fix the vacuum AND finish cleaning up the mess. /sigh
On Monday the kids had preschool, and that was fun for them as usual. After I picked them up I met my mom at Great Clips and we cut off all of Ben's hair. I'm still traumatized. Everyone keeps telling me how cute he is and how happy I should be, but I'm not happy. He is cute. He's the cutest little boy I've ever seen. That's just it, though. He's a little boy. My baby is gone.
The kids got a bunch of new books this week. We finished out the What do you Hear/See collection by Eric Carle and added Animalia, Once Upon an Alphabet, Little Blue Truck Leads the Way and Goodnight Moon to our library. I love how much the kids love books.
Other than that I just spent some time getting the kids ready for their Valentine's Day festivities at school on Tuesday. I made goody bags for each child with kinetic sand, a heart necklace, a box of conversation hearts and 2 rolls of smarties. I hope the kids like them
I've been staying busier in general. Working is surely going to help. I am also remembering how much I like crossword puzzles, and have been spending some time on that. I've got a couple of books in the works, Tears and Tantrums by Aletha Solter and The Fault in Our Stars by some person I don't know the name of. The latter is turning out to be another book in a long string disappointing and badly written young adult literature, but to be fair I'm only a couple chapters in.
Saturday, February 7, 2015
60 Days Without Facebook - Day 3
February 7, 2015
I was so busy today I didn't have time to miss Facebook. Win. Win. Win. Heading to bed. I'll surely have more to say tomorrow since I'm starting a new job, and there are some other things of note, but I'm too tired tonight to worry with it. LOL
I was so busy today I didn't have time to miss Facebook. Win. Win. Win. Heading to bed. I'll surely have more to say tomorrow since I'm starting a new job, and there are some other things of note, but I'm too tired tonight to worry with it. LOL
Friday, February 6, 2015
60 Days Without Facebook - Day 2
February 6, 2015
So today I feel I made some progress. I started out the day by making the kids a yummy, hot breakfast of cheese toast and scrambled eggs. Sadly, I have gotten very much out of the habit of preparing them a hot breakfast every day, and that's just been flat out lazy of me. We all had a nice breakfast and that was a good way to start the day.
I also had to get out of the house to see the surgeon for my follow-up, and the visit was positive. My recovery is progressing better than I thought that it would. I am finally in less pain, and I am hopeful that this almost 3 year long ordeal is going to be behind me very soon, provided I stay on track with physical therapy. It was good to just get out of the house, and I am happy that the weekend will be lovely weather-wise, and I plan to get the kids out to the park for a few hours on Sunday. I think the fresh air and sunshine will be good for all of us.
I also read some news that I didn't obtain from Facebook, and while I felt that there were things I would've read and posted to Facebook the urge to do so wasn't very overwhelming. The primary thing I read and liked was the story of President Obama's speech at the National Prayer Breakfast on Thursday. The President continues to impress me, and I love that he has finally reached the stage of being more assertive and "in your face" with his commentary and stances on the issues plaguing the country. I only wish he could've found his voice years ago, and not just in the last 2 years of his stretch as President.
I played with the kids a LOT today, probably more than I have in a very long time. Unplugging myself from Facebook is really starting to make a difference in the level that I plug in with them. We brought out their kinetic sand kits for the first time, and they had a blast playing with it for well over an hour. After that we spent about an hour just putting together puzzles. Every day they amaze me more and more, and it is such a joy to watch their little minds at work.
One thing that I have realized over the last 2 days is that I have connected so much in my life to Facebook. One thing that stands out in particular is how many websites I have set up to log in through my Facebook account. I've actually had to reactivate my account a couple of times to change those settings. Both times I was able to resist temptation to check all those notifications just sitting there waiting for me, and just pop in to deactivate my account again. This is getting easier.
I've been spending quite a bit of time doing crossword and word find puzzles. It feels good to exercise my brain on things like this that I used to enjoy, but fell by the wayside in lieu of social media. I feel confident that over time I will begin to spend more time reading, doing projects with the kids and I've considered getting myself a membership to the YMCA so I can do some yoga and use the recumbent bikes. I think that yoga will be good for my anxiety, and the recumbent bike would be great therapy for my knee. Win, win.
Mike has picked up the cold that the kids had last week, and he's feeling pretty rough. Today I made another batch of the homemade cough syrup that worked so well for the kids, although I don't know that he will actually partake in my "hippie voodoo cough syrup" it is there waiting just in case any of us need it. I also tried my hand at homemade chest rub (Vick's chest rub) for the first time. It seems to have worked very well. I'll post the recipes in another post tomorrow.
Anyway, I am headed to bed, and I feel more satisfied and tired than the past 2 nights. I feel confident that I will fall asleep much more easily tonight, and get better rest. Hopefully tonight there will be no strange dreams about being in love with Seth Rogen. Haha!
It's still one day at a time, but the days are getting shorter, and longer at the same time as I begin to plug back in to the things that I used to find enjoyable. I only watched about 30 minutes of TV today, and I don't even remember the last time that happened.
Goodnight world. :)
So today I feel I made some progress. I started out the day by making the kids a yummy, hot breakfast of cheese toast and scrambled eggs. Sadly, I have gotten very much out of the habit of preparing them a hot breakfast every day, and that's just been flat out lazy of me. We all had a nice breakfast and that was a good way to start the day.
I also had to get out of the house to see the surgeon for my follow-up, and the visit was positive. My recovery is progressing better than I thought that it would. I am finally in less pain, and I am hopeful that this almost 3 year long ordeal is going to be behind me very soon, provided I stay on track with physical therapy. It was good to just get out of the house, and I am happy that the weekend will be lovely weather-wise, and I plan to get the kids out to the park for a few hours on Sunday. I think the fresh air and sunshine will be good for all of us.
I also read some news that I didn't obtain from Facebook, and while I felt that there were things I would've read and posted to Facebook the urge to do so wasn't very overwhelming. The primary thing I read and liked was the story of President Obama's speech at the National Prayer Breakfast on Thursday. The President continues to impress me, and I love that he has finally reached the stage of being more assertive and "in your face" with his commentary and stances on the issues plaguing the country. I only wish he could've found his voice years ago, and not just in the last 2 years of his stretch as President.
I played with the kids a LOT today, probably more than I have in a very long time. Unplugging myself from Facebook is really starting to make a difference in the level that I plug in with them. We brought out their kinetic sand kits for the first time, and they had a blast playing with it for well over an hour. After that we spent about an hour just putting together puzzles. Every day they amaze me more and more, and it is such a joy to watch their little minds at work.
One thing that I have realized over the last 2 days is that I have connected so much in my life to Facebook. One thing that stands out in particular is how many websites I have set up to log in through my Facebook account. I've actually had to reactivate my account a couple of times to change those settings. Both times I was able to resist temptation to check all those notifications just sitting there waiting for me, and just pop in to deactivate my account again. This is getting easier.
I've been spending quite a bit of time doing crossword and word find puzzles. It feels good to exercise my brain on things like this that I used to enjoy, but fell by the wayside in lieu of social media. I feel confident that over time I will begin to spend more time reading, doing projects with the kids and I've considered getting myself a membership to the YMCA so I can do some yoga and use the recumbent bikes. I think that yoga will be good for my anxiety, and the recumbent bike would be great therapy for my knee. Win, win.
Mike has picked up the cold that the kids had last week, and he's feeling pretty rough. Today I made another batch of the homemade cough syrup that worked so well for the kids, although I don't know that he will actually partake in my "hippie voodoo cough syrup" it is there waiting just in case any of us need it. I also tried my hand at homemade chest rub (Vick's chest rub) for the first time. It seems to have worked very well. I'll post the recipes in another post tomorrow.
Anyway, I am headed to bed, and I feel more satisfied and tired than the past 2 nights. I feel confident that I will fall asleep much more easily tonight, and get better rest. Hopefully tonight there will be no strange dreams about being in love with Seth Rogen. Haha!
It's still one day at a time, but the days are getting shorter, and longer at the same time as I begin to plug back in to the things that I used to find enjoyable. I only watched about 30 minutes of TV today, and I don't even remember the last time that happened.
Goodnight world. :)
Dance Baby Dance!
I have tried for almost 2 years to get a video of Emmie Kate dancing. Finally got it today!!
Her moves are so funny. <3
Second Night Without Facebook
I usually check Facebook hundreds of times per day. Especially at night. I lay in bed at night and catch up on news, chat with friends and lull myself to sleep with phone in hand. Last night was really, really hard. There are some other things that I will not go into detail on and I am also battling a cold, so it was pretty difficult to get to sleep, so I just laid there in the dark and listened to my daughter breathe. I laid there alone with all my thoughts, worries, stresses, fears. It was not fun. I was not comforted. I don't like it. I woke up at 3am and wanted to check Facebook. Instead I saw that I had 2 text messages, one from Alicia and one from Amanda. I read them, yes at 3am, got up to use the bathroom, and then laid back in bed stared at the ceiling and went back to all of those uncomfortable thoughts from earlier in the night. I could feel my anxiety welling back up, and again kicked myself for allowing myself to run out of Xanax 3 days early. I really have the most terrible timing. I finally did get back to sleep. When I woke up at 6am I just said "screw it" and got up. I used to laugh at my dad for getting up several times per night to smoke cigarettes. I realize now that this is much the same. Who wakes up in the middle of the night and thinks "must check Facebook!" I know I'm not the only one, but I would wager a guess that it's not something anyone would feel particularly excited or proud to admit.
After I'd been up a while I remembered that I had a dream last night I was in high school with Seth Rogen, and I DESPERATELY wanted to date him. I'm not ruling out the possibility that I'm losing my mind.
After I'd been up a while I remembered that I had a dream last night I was in high school with Seth Rogen, and I DESPERATELY wanted to date him. I'm not ruling out the possibility that I'm losing my mind.
Thursday, February 5, 2015
The First 24 Hours...
February 5, 2015
So today, almost in rebellion to myself in general, I did nothing productive except apply for a few jobs online. Other than that I just watched my kids play, watched a lot of TV, and thought about how much I miss Facebook.
Yes, I know how pathetic I sound.
So, just for kicks I did a Google search entitled "How to Survive Without Facebook." I figured I would be the only one pathetic enough to have even experienced this, let alone been brave enough to write about it, but I was SO wrong.
Not only are there hundreds (if not thousands) of articles dedicated to living without Facebook, but here is a glance of searches Google finds related to "how to survive without Facebook."
Shit has gotten real, y'all.
I initially did a search for just "how to survive" and found this neat little ditty . How to Survive the First 168 Hours After a Break-up. Fair enough. I feel like I've broken up with Facebook, albeit with the understanding that we will have a glorious reunion 59 days from now. The article says the first 24 hours is crucial. "unplug from social media" it suggests. OK. Done. What's next? From 24-48 hours you need to "Alert your Support Network." Ummm...fuck this stupid article. I'M BREAKING UP WITH MY SUPPORT NETWORK!! That article was useless and the author clearly is not down with the struggle. It's real.
All I can say at this point is that I hate this and I want to go back to Facebook SO badly. I know from previous experience, however, that going back to Facebook now is the worst thing I can do BECAUSE I want to so badly. If I had been gone for a day and hardly gave it a second thought then it would seem somehow more appropriate to head on back, but I'm very convinced at this point that I'm doing the right thing. Hopefully by the end of the 60 days I'll be more like this guy...
Unbelievably Zen Dude
In other news:
1) We're making potty training progress with EK....FINALLLLLLY
2) EK told Ben he was her best friend for the first time today
3) EK told daddy today that she was upset and wanted to "talk about it with my words." It's working! It's working!
So today, almost in rebellion to myself in general, I did nothing productive except apply for a few jobs online. Other than that I just watched my kids play, watched a lot of TV, and thought about how much I miss Facebook.
Yes, I know how pathetic I sound.
So, just for kicks I did a Google search entitled "How to Survive Without Facebook." I figured I would be the only one pathetic enough to have even experienced this, let alone been brave enough to write about it, but I was SO wrong.
Not only are there hundreds (if not thousands) of articles dedicated to living without Facebook, but here is a glance of searches Google finds related to "how to survive without Facebook."
I initially did a search for just "how to survive" and found this neat little ditty . How to Survive the First 168 Hours After a Break-up. Fair enough. I feel like I've broken up with Facebook, albeit with the understanding that we will have a glorious reunion 59 days from now. The article says the first 24 hours is crucial. "unplug from social media" it suggests. OK. Done. What's next? From 24-48 hours you need to "Alert your Support Network." Ummm...fuck this stupid article. I'M BREAKING UP WITH MY SUPPORT NETWORK!! That article was useless and the author clearly is not down with the struggle. It's real.
All I can say at this point is that I hate this and I want to go back to Facebook SO badly. I know from previous experience, however, that going back to Facebook now is the worst thing I can do BECAUSE I want to so badly. If I had been gone for a day and hardly gave it a second thought then it would seem somehow more appropriate to head on back, but I'm very convinced at this point that I'm doing the right thing. Hopefully by the end of the 60 days I'll be more like this guy...
Unbelievably Zen Dude
"We socialize, but do we fear being alone?Is there something scary in an empty inbox? Are we bored to death without checking Facebook or Twitter or Instagram or Tumblr other social sites?Can we disconnect and face the fear of being by ourselves, without distractions, with nothing but the thing we want to create?Try it for a day: go a day without going to Facebook or any of the other social sites you might traverse on a regular basis...This solitude can be scary (emphasis mine because #thestruggleisreal), but in time we can learn to be our own companion, learn that there’s no better company. That’s a valuable lesson to learn."
In other news:
1) We're making potty training progress with EK....FINALLLLLLY
2) EK told Ben he was her best friend for the first time today
3) EK told daddy today that she was upset and wanted to "talk about it with my words." It's working! It's working!
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